Post idea: Addressing an issue on the team

[SeanKilleen]

Someone asked me for some advice with a situation and I figured I'd capture my response in case it's helpful.

The situation below has been genericized to an issue around punctuality and missing a meeting.

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My approach would be to structure it something like this:

• "Hey, I wanted to address a pattern with you that I've been noticing and get your thoughts on it."
• "Lately, there's been a pattern around punctuality. I've noticed that you're missing our 1:1s, which are an important space for us to discuss what's happening for you and your growth as well as important conversations we need to have. I take 1:1s very seriously because they're one of the few direct touchpoints we have."
• "Things come up occasionally, and that's fine. When that happens, I expect you to let me know that you're running late so that I can adjust my plans, just as I would do for you."
• "With all that said, my job is to help. Can you give me some insight into what's going on, so that we can think about ways to enable you to be more punctual? I'm also interested to understand if you don't feel you're getting value out of the meeting, so that we can adapt that too."

This does a couple of things:

• Clearly states the issue
• Describes the "why" it's a problem
• Positions you as someone who can help co-create a solution vs policing him
• Transitions into an open-ended discussion where you can really listen for what they're saying
• Allows space for feedback on if they feel the meeting isn't worth their time, and why. Explicitly calls it out so that someone can be comfortable raising it.