announcing
The Hackathon for rejects
when -> Friday, September 15 to Sunday, September 17, 2017
where -> Juri's living room near Haldenegg
Did Hack Zurich (just like your parents) not want you?
- because you filled out the application like any shitty internet form, providing as few personal details as possible
- because you didn't realize you had to send your resumé, a handwritten motivational letter, and erotic fanfiction featuring the the all-male cast of the Jury in a sensual yet tasteful tropical island setting? (mentioned on the registration page, go look it up)
- because the only language choices were Java and PHP 4 (list recited purely from memory)
- because you're not an idea person
- because you don't blockchain, and machine learning is so 2015
In short
- because you're just not very cool
You're a total LOSER. And now your feelings are hurt.
But wait, now there's a solution! Get together with other losers in a completely uncompetitive environment where EVERYBODY WINS A PRIZE.
Shape the Future, today! More synergies! Approachable. Diminished corporate influence! Low effort!
💯 more emojis and exclamation marks than competing events, proof of increased 🔥 enthusiasm!
We have
- No speakers
- A complete lack of organization (but we have a location!)
- No sponsorship
- Unfortunately no plastic nametags on lanyards that you can hang yourself with
- No free garbage
- No Jury
- No winners
- No expectations!
Juri's living room, near Central in the middle of Zurich. Now with more WiFi, provided our neighbour doesn't change the password again. I will give you the address once you register, because I don't want internet murderers to find me. #security-conscious
one for total beginners, and once for more advanced losers. i will set something up soon, i promise. anything else you wanna work on is cool too
(some of these options are blatantly copy-pasted from an actual professionally organized hackathon because this is meant to be a low-effort event and also because I think you can't be sued for that)
A: Yes, it's the door to the right of the kitchen
A: Two options:
- Hang with us and we'll teach you stuff!
- Use the fully equipped woodworking shop in my bedroom and build your own furniture (please note I only have ash, a little bit of oak and what I think is elm (no relation to the programming language; but HEY, let's learn some Elm, it looks FUN) on stock, but it should be enough for a coffee table or a couple of chairs. Also, we don't have any 1st-aid people on call, but the Waid Hospital is close by and very easy to get to, even via Uber, and the guy at the reception is very nice and understanding. But we're drifting a bit off-topic here, BACK TO COMPUTER STUFF).
A: Because we are the more lenient event, team size should be at least one person, and there is no upper bound.
A: Come and do C, Haskell, Plankalkül, Ruby, Visual Basic, we don't give a shit! No judgement, everything goes! (seriously, last week I said I was ok with tourists eating fondue in the middle of summer; this is the level of tolerance you can expect from our event, even if earlier I implicitly made fun of Java and php, I'm sorry)
A: Work on anything! Have a coffee! Make friends! Work by yourself in a corner and avoid making eye contact with anyone!
A: What? Of course. Why would we own code you wrote? Who does that? Oh wait, the Hackathon of the place I work at definitely does that.
A: xx email address here xx
A: No. Yes. Sort of. My flatmate Maria got accepted into the actual Hack Zurich, so you can use her room. It is very empty and might seem like the den of a heroin-addict at first glance, but I promise she's cool and she just likes it that way, because of the way she is, not because of heroin.
A: yes
A: No.
A: That is basically the entire goal of this event. I will try to convince Dražen to bring his cat!
A: Haha, fuck no.
(these may or may not be borrowed from elsewhere, which is why the names are most definitely made up.)
Tolles Event! Genau an solchen Veranstaltungen können wichtige Entdeckungen für die Zukunft gemacht werden. Zwei Daumen hoch - Bob
"Wir wollen die Innovationskultur von [...] fördern und nutzen, indem wir Ideen mit starkem Fokus auf die Kundenschnittstelle entwickeln. Damit setzen wir gegen innen und aussen ein Zeichen, indem wir als fortschrittliches und dynamisches Unternehmen wahrgenommen werden“ - Rolf
dude this isnt finished yet, pls calm down for a second while i set this up
OK! xx again, insert email here xx