bash-insulter

Randomly insults the user when typing wrong command.

Change insults as needed :)

noob@bender:~ $ sl

  Y u no speak computer???

-bash: sl: command not found
noob@bender:~ $ gti status

  This is why nobody likes you.

-bash: gti: command not found
noob@bender:~ $ sp aux

  Go outside.

-bash: sp: command not found

Compatibility

Bash v4 and newer
Zsh

Installation

# Method 1 - know what you are doing
git clone https://github.com/tempse/bash-insulter.git bash-insulter
sudo cp bash-insulter/src/bash.command-not-found /etc/
cp bash-insulter/src/insults ~/.insults

# Method 2 - I don't care, insult me!
sudo wget -O /etc/bash.command-not-found https://raw.githubusercontent.com/tempse/bash-insulter/master/src/bash.command-not-found && sudo wget -O ~/.insults https://raw.githubusercontent.com/tempse/bash-insulter/master/src/insults

Then source the file automatically for new logins by adding the following to /etc/bash.bashrc or any of the other locations where you can configure your shell automatically during login (zsh have different config files):

if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found
fi

Configuration

bash-insulter can be customized, or even be made polite and nice, by populating CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS or CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS_APPEND environment variables. The values should be arrays. CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS replaces the default messages, while CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS_APPEND appends more messages to the existing ones.

It is probably cleanest to source a file populating the environment variable as needed. In this example I create a file /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages with the following content:

CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS=(
    "You are so smart!"
    "You look pretty today!"
    "I don't know what to say"
)

Then source this file before you source the script:

if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages
fi

if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found
fi

Then logout and in again. The end result is that you will now use your messages instead of the default ones.